Black Wings

i was having pretty rough night ..
quite stressed.. tense all that.. nothing was working out..
had 2 beers.. and walked alone in the rain for awhile..

The cold was embracing..
The rain, raw and unbecoming..
The morning sky painted stunning lilac and blue..
And me standing alone in the middle of it..
The cool rain drops pounding as i look into the sky..
My hands reach up.. trying to grasp.. something anything..
Soaked to the bone i felt my spirit lift..
Chilling dew runs down the back of my neck..
i feel my back tear and my wings spread out..
The cry echos the streets..
The silence shatters in the instance..
Kneeling on the gravel..
Black wings wrap me tight
I didn't want to leave.. the rain was me.
So cold.. dense.. tired and gloomy..
So dark and lost.. the winds went right through me..
Perfect the night that i became..

"Little angel go away,
Come again some other day.
Devil has my ear today,
I'll never hear a word you say.
He promised I would find a little solace,
And some piece of mind.
Whatever just as long as I don't feel so,
Desperate and Ravenous.
I'm so weak and powerless over you."
A perfect circle.weak and powerless

Rain.. rain...

okay.. so todae i woke up like at 3.30pm..
omg~ i can't believe i got up so late..
usually if i have a late night drinking or clubbing..
its okay.. but.. it wasn't a late night.. so yah.. *sigh*

anyway.. as u probably can guess its
raining outside.. HuGE fat drops too.. ChUBBy raiN~
but luckily there was So much good tv on.. eh.. i caught..
the orsbournes~.. which i adore.. fucking funny stuff..
and.. the Cuetech cue american womens pool nationals..
jeanette lee was playing karen corr.. omG~!
jeanette Lee Rules~! Her playing is so good, she's asian
& she's so hot~~.. *drooL* she beat karens bitch ass~!
and... Oh.. the wade robson project on mtv..
u know that show where they go from town to town..
holding dance auditions and pick the best..?
yah man.. it was mad hot... everyone was just
throwin it down on the dance floor..
makes me wanna take up dj'ing or dancing..
when i got the time.. AND $$$..
hahahax.. i'll add that to my list of..
"should do in this lifetime"

after all that tv i still haven't started work..
looks like i'll be up late.. *sigh*.. but
strangly.. looking forward to doing my work..
totally freaky.. its so NOT me to wanna do work..
*grin*.. o well.. lyrics 2 end..?
here's incubus..
love the title.. i wish.. she was here~~
so sappy right..? haha enjoy the song..

"I dig my toes into the sand
The ocean looks like a thousand diamonds strewn across a blue blanket
I lean against the wind
Pretend that I am weightless
And in this moment I am happy...happy
I wish you were here"
Incubus. i wish you were here.

Quick_One

Yup... toade i'm just gonna make it quick..
was up all night.. din sleep till 4.30am..
and woke up to go career fair with tris..
which was real good.. answered some questions..
at least i qualify for some unis.. and got SOME direction..
basically spent the last 2 daes healing up my damn throat..
slacking at home.. working on some songs.. play guitar..
but they aren't any good.. yah anyway..
gonna pia my assignments.. at least gotta finish 2 and a half..
anyway.. here's some lyrics from a new song i like..
by The Rasmus.. its abit poppy for me.. but its still Gud~

"In The Shadows"
No sleep
No sleep untill I am done with finding the answer
Wont stop
Wont stop before I find a cure for this cancer
Sometimes
I feel I going down and so disconnected
Somehow
I know that I am haunted to be wanted

I been watching
I been waiting
In the shadows all my time
I been searching
I been living
For tomorrows all my life

Lately I been walking walking in circles, watching waiting for something
Feel me touch me heal me, come take me higher

I got... c for geography, d for bio, d for econs and a B3 for gp..
*sigh*.. i mean when i got my results i was.. like.. okay..
i'm a LIL disappointed.. BUT
at least i didn't fail .. and i was.. okay with it.. for awhile..
but as the dae dragged on..
and i heard more and more pple do so much better..
i kept thinking.. is "okay" good enough..?
and i think.. PERSONALLY it isn't.. but its already over..
i sure would have liked to score better.. i mean who woulden't..
so i guess i'm gonna try not dwell on it..

btw been having a killer sore throat the last 3 days..
and its gotten worse and worse..
think its at its absolute most sore tonight..
actualli tris and i just came back from embargo..
had a pretty good time.. watched my drinking...(not too much~!)
caught up with the marist guys.. damn fun..*grin*
and at the same time.. we hung out with..
nicole( i did spell it right! ah Ha) trina and lynn..
i certianly was an entertaining night man.. i mean.. dude..
the barf was so sick.. but entertaining.. haha..
and i shouted.. spoke to loudly.. all that..
now i can't say a sentence without "twanging" a word..
its bad.. voice is pretty fucked..
strangly i kinda like it.. haha.. but not gonna keep it..
it'll kill my throat..
andway.. did sum werid quiz thingie..
supposed to show what winged being i am..

Dark Angelic

I'll bet you expected this answer. You already knew you were a DARK ANGELIC, didn't you? You are similar to a demon but slightly different in that you don't revel in evil...you revel in pleasure. Your wings resemble an angel's but if that's so then you are a Fallen Angel - your love of sin caused you to be cast from the Heavens. They are black as raven wings and are nearly as dark as your desires. You are faithless and love it - you believe there is no Judgement Day to fear and so you can do what you want! You have a refined concept of what is sexy and a slightly chaotic sense of 'fun.' In fact, you love chaos and view much of what you do as a game. You are typically attracted to those that will challenge your mind, power, and wit...and are 'dangerous' people like you. It's not unlikely that you are bisexual or at least open to the concept, because you seek excitement and passion everywhere and in everyone. Chances are you have a special talent for magick - you're a powerful being and you know what you want. Like a Serpent of Eden you like to try your powers of seduction and manipulation, though your intent is rarely to cause harm. You have a deep, dark sense of art and/or poetry, because your mind is a deep, dark place. While typically smirking, amused, and sarcastic, you are capable of severe revenge and a passion and intensity unrivaled by any other. In your eyes life is for enjoyment and pleasure - nothing else. If you're not having fun in your own twisted way, you're not happy. You are easily bored with the vast majority of people. You are most likely drawn towards the Gothic subculture and probably adore Goth music, art, and style. Many people look down on your seemingly careless lifestyle and may even consider you 'slutty'. Not true. You just know you're sexy and you're damn proud of it. Dark Angels have an outlook most like Satanists - loving sin and looking to none but themselves for power. Congratulations! You're my kindred spirit. As far as I'm concerned - you know what life is REALLY about. Have fun...Muahaha.

most stuff is right.. all except the gay shit man.. no fucking way..

Lyrics.. okay.. errmm..
the thing is.. the song ain't complete yet..
and i'm trying to work out a chorus and bridge..
But here they are anyway..
i think i'll call it falling.. yah i like that..
Falling
onli 4 verses.. i need a chorus

Lying in my bed at night,
outside my room a flickering light.
the shadows dance upon my bedroom wall.

And suddenly it comes 2 me,
i'm not the man i want to be.
and pieces of my world begin 2 fall..(fall~)
*chorus*

The sun has set its time to go,
and in the end we'll never know.
you went your way and didn't say good bye

Ten years from now along the street,
we meet and you look just as sweet,
just strangers walking past we don't say hi..
*chorus*
and i need an outtro..
so yah.. i like it..
all the stress is buliding up to tmr.. fucking hell..!
my fucking cough and sore throat are killing me..
Damn bloody results coming out tmr..*ahem* i mean todae..
and so many pple waiting to hear how i scored..
my mom.. my uncles.. my grandma.. (would you believe it?)
i can't bloody think straight with my fucking headache..
AND the song choruses aren't working out..
man i am So ticked now.. i meant to swear off alcohol for awhile..
but man this night is driving me nuts..!
argh~..! Fucking shit man... thank god i dun haf 2 censor words here..
i'm going down to have a beer.. and.. stuff...
then gonna knock off.. stupid a's..