Another tough day's work in acid bar..
on one of the longest days of my life..

As you can probably tell from my past posts..
its been an emo week..
and now i am just tired..

like a soldier falls of fatigue after battle..
i too am on my knees..
eyes shut tight to rest my eyes and possibly my mind..
and i muster a last resignated sigh..
and wonder where we go from here..

Sometimes i step back..
and i catch myself thinking and worrying..
getting insecure and restless..
about things that really shouldn't bother me at all..
and it sucks.. emotionally i let these things eat at me..
leaving me with little if not nothing at the end of the day..

i have a tonne to get done this week..
i need to remember to smile..= D
and not let things eat away at me..

But first.. instant noodles and a short nap..!
i need my strength!

Its been awhile since i leaned over the balcony..
Whisky on the rocks on the side..
Gazing outward into the midnight sky..
The clouds add comforting whisps of shade..

The night air is cool and refreshing as i take it all in..
instantly my shoulders feel lighter
and the world stands peaceful..
And i begin to reflect..

Looking out, I think about the past and look towards the future..
and i realise this..

Life is really all about accepting the past and letting it go..
Sometimes we grip tight to the happy and sad memories..
And it runs around our heads and grips around our hearts..
It keeps us sacred and confused.. and we never move on..
But we feel safe.. always knowing what was..

This illusion of safety masks our eyes..
And comfort and stegnancy reside,
Where new hope and opportunity should be..

Honor and forgive the good and the bad.. breathe out..
and let it go.. immediatly you'll feel an empty space open up..
It feels so awkward to have nothing.. a blank canvas..
and you start making your way.. a new way..
One that will ultimatly lead to bigger and better things..

Its been awhile since i made such a post...
it feels good.. There is no love where fear resides..

Andrew

Dear dad.. i miss you so.. thanks for this gift..
you didn't have to die for us to be happy.. it wasn't worth it..
this post is for you..
thanks for being such a driving force in my life..
even after ur gone..

Your Son..